Oh Gnome You Don’t! But we did…

Gnomes seem to be everywhere this year.  “Gnomeo and Juliet” is in theaters, my mother-in-law is writing a book featuring a gnome, and “Oh Gnome You Don’t” just hit the shelves.  It seems that gnomes are the zombies, or Cthulhu, of the 2011 Spring season.  So of course we had to write a review of this phenomenon’s board game side of the mania.

“Oh Gnome You Don’t!” is a sassy, jewel collecting, gnome wedgieing, roll and move game from “Gut Bustin’ Games”.  These are the same folks who make “Red Neck Life” and “Trailer Park Wars“, but unlike their other games Gut Bustin’ went out on a limb and did something different this time:  They hired an artist.

Previous games from this company have included slews of photos of trailer parks or beat up cars (or in a new game they have in production: garage sale junk).   The photos are funny, but it was really nice to see them doing something else.  Actually, the first thing the group I played with commented on was just how pretty the artwork for this game is.  Two Tree Illustrations did an excellent job.

As usual, I have to take my hat off to Lisa Bowman, the games creator, for her excellent instruction sheet.  I swear I got more giggles out of reading the rules then a grown woman probably should. I mean, dang.  But more then just funny, her instructions are written in such a manner, that you don’t need to read the whole booklet in order to get playing, which I’m sure all the designated rule readers in the world will applaud along with me.

A look at the movers used in the game. I particularly like the purple gnome.

So the game begins with a pack of gnomes (the players) setting off on a trail through the forest to collect gems.  The end result of making it to the finish with the most gems in hand.  How do you do that?  By selling trinkets at gnome shops, mining, and beating up your fellow gnome for what they have already acquired.

The basic turn consists of rolling a die and moving that number of squares, playing a card, and then drawing a new one.  Chant after me:  ROLL, MOVE, PLAY, DRAW.  The card playing is really the heart and soul of this game, with the rolling and moving simply acting as a catalyst for battling as well as the game’s end.

There are a few different types of cards, each with different inherent abilities.  Item cards are trinkets or food that you can sell at shops located on the board.  There are also action and reaction cards that let you do things to your opponent such as send them forward or back on the board, or make them drop some gems along the way.

The other kind of card each player possesses is a “brawl” card.  These are what resolve the battles, and determines how much loot you beat out of your opponent.  Each card has a number and an amusing description and picture.  The number is really the only “important” thing though.  Both players choose one of these numbered cards and reveal them at the same time.  The player with the highest number has won the battle and receives the difference in gems from their opponent (if I played a 10 and you played a 7, I would win 3 gems from you, because 3 is the difference between 10 and 7).

This is a classic example of a brawl. Blue played out the five (Butt Boot), while Green played out a ten (Wedgie Yank). Thus green wins by five and receives five gems from blue.

“Oh Gnome You Don’t” unfortunately had one major flaw, which seems to accompany all Gut Bustin’ Games:  It takes too darn long!  Given the mechanics, it’s not exactly riveting enough to want to spend two hours playing it.  It’s a good filler game, not the main course, however the run time doesn’t allow for it to fall into it’s proper role at the gaming table.  Playing with my group we determined that what this game really needed was another die or two.  One player even suggested substituting the one six-sided die that came with the game for three four-sided dice, this way you always moved at least 3, but didn’t ever move more than 12, thus setting a good pace.  If you find the game is too long for your group as well, I would suggest trying out these alterations for best fit.

The "Oh Gnome You Don't" board. Gnomes follow the path of rocks around the board.

My final opinion?  While “Oh Gnome You Don’t” doesn’t have any ingenious mechanics, it’s amusing.  It’s a good fluff game, as long as your group can figure out how many dice are optimal for you to play with.  It’s also really nice to see the company attempting to branch out into drawn art, rather then relying on photos.  “Oh Gnome You Don’t” is another example of Gut Bustin’ doing what Gut Bustin’ is gnome to do (sorry couldn’t help myself).  They take our classic childhood games, like Life and Candy Land, and revamp them with a new theme and a lot of humor.

This entry was posted by The_Null_Entry on Wednesday, March 9th, 2011 at 10:30 am and is filed under Board Game Reviews, Theme Games . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.


  1. Tremendous things here. I am very satisfied to see your post.
    Thank you a lot and I’m taking a look forward to contact you.
    Will you please drop me a e-mail?

  2. Thanks on your marvelous posting! I seriously enjoyed reading it, you are a great
    author. I will make certain to bookmark your blog and may come back later on. I want to encourage yourself
    to continue your great writing, have a nice weekend!

  3. Itamar Serp says:

    It’s going to be end of mine day, however before end I am reading this fantastic piece of writing
    to improve my knowledge.

  4. Grupo Coral says:

    I’d like to find out more? I’d love to find out more

  5. of course like your web-site however you have to take a look at the
    spelling on quite a few of your posts. A number of them
    are rife with spelling issues and I to find it very troublesome to inform the reality however I will certainly come back again.

  6. Today, I went to the beachfront with my kids. I found a sea shell and gave it to my 4 year old daughter and said “You can hear the ocean if you put this to your ear.” She placed the shell to her ear and screamed.
    There was a hermit crab inside and it pinched her ear. She
    never wants to go back! LoL I know this is entirely off topic but I had to tell

  7. Woah! I’m really loving the template/theme of this site.
    It’s simple, yet effective. A lot of times it’s tough to get that “perfect balance” between usability and visual appeal.
    I must say you have done a great job with this. Additionally, the blog loads extremely fast for me on Firefox.

    Superb Blog!

  8. hello!,I really like your writing so much! share we be in contact more about your
    post on AOL? I require an expert in this space to resolve my problem.
    May be that’s you! Having a look forward to peer you.

  9. Hi there! This is my 1st comment here so I just wanted to
    give a quick shout out and say I truly enjoy reading your articles.
    Can you suggest any other blogs/websites/forums that go over the same
    topics? Many thanks!

  10. arusys.co.za says:

    Hi there, just wanted to mention, I liked this article.
    It was inspiring. Keep on posting!

  11. Itamar Serp says:

    Thanks designed for sharing such a fastidious idea, paragraph is nice, thats why i have read it entirely

  12. You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this matter to be really something that I think I would never understand.

    It seems too complex and extremely broad for me.
    I’m looking forward for your next post, I will try to get the hang of it!

  13. I’m extremely impressed with your writing skills and also with the
    layout on your weblog. Is this a paid theme or did you modify it yourself?

    Anyway keep up the excellent quality writing, it is rare to see a great blog like this one today.

  14. Heya i am for the first time here. I came across this board and I in finding It truly
    useful & it helped me out a lot. I am hoping to
    present something back and aid others such as you aided me.

  15. Thank you for another informative web site. Where else may just I get that kind of info written in such an ideal manner?

    I’ve a challenge that I’m just now operating on, and I’ve
    been at the look out for such info.

  16. I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme.
    Did you make this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it
    for you? Plz reply as I’m looking to design my own blog and would like to find out where u got this from.

    thanks a lot

  17. Heya i am for the primary time here. I came across
    this board and I in finding It really helpful & it helped me out a lot.
    I hope to offer one thing back and aid others such as you helped me.

  18. I just could not depart your web site prior to suggesting that I extremely enjoyed the standard
    info an individual supply for your guests?
    Is gonna be again ceaselessly to check up on new posts

  19. Thanks for one’s marvelous posting! I really enjoyed reading
    it, you are a great author.I will remember to bookmark your blog and will eventually
    come back later on. I want to encourage yourself to continue your great writing, have a nice morning!

  20. timex watch says:

    Nice post. I was checking constantly this blog and I’m inspired!
    Extremely helpful information particularly the final section 🙂 I deal with such information much.
    I was seeking this certain info for a very long time.

    Thanks and good luck.

  21. Do you mind if I quote a few of your articles as long as I provide credit and
    sources back to your blog? My blog is in the very same niche as yours and my users would genuinely benefit from some of the information you provide here.
    Please let me know if this alright with you. Regards!

  22. Greetings from Carolina! I’m bored to tears at work so I decided to check out your
    site on my iphone during lunch break. I enjoy the info you provide here and can’t wait to take a look when I get home.
    I’m amazed at how quick your blog loaded on my phone ..
    I’m not even using WIFI, just 3G .. Anyways, amazing

  23. Terrific article! This is the kind of info that are meant to be shared around the web.
    Disgrace on Google for no longer positioning this post upper!
    Come on over and talk over with my website . Thank you =)

  24. There’s certainly a great deal to find out about this topic.
    I like all the points you have made.

  25. domain names says:

    Hello there, You have done a great job. I will definitely digg it and personally recommend to my friends.
    I’m sure they will be benefited from this web site.

  26. Magnificent beat ! I would like to apprentice while you amend your website, how can i subscribe for a blog
    web site? The account aided me a acceptable deal. I had been a little bit acquainted of
    this your broadcast provided bright clear concept

  27. Everything is very open with a precise description of the
    issues. It was truly informative. Your site is extremely helpful.
    Thank you for sharing!

  28. Hello very cool web site!! Guy .. Beautiful .. Wonderful
    .. I’ll bookmark your site and take the feeds additionally?
    I am satisfied to seek out numerous helpful info here within the submit,
    we want work out extra strategies on this regard, thank
    you for sharing. . . . . .

  29. Hi there, for all time i used to check blog posts here early in the dawn,
    since i enjoy to find out more and more.

  30. Hello, i think that i saw you visited my web site
    thus i came to return the desire?.I am trying to to find issues to enhance my site!I guess its ok to use a few of your ideas!!

  31. Right now it seems like BlogEngine is the preferred
    blogging platform available right now. (from what I’ve read) Is that what
    you are using on your blog?

  32. You sure know what you’re talking about. Everyone is going to soon be visiting your site.

  33. I just got done eating a platter of spaghetti before visiting your site. It sure makes the full feeling all that much better.

  34. I have a new list for all of you to use. I try to post new lists every day. Thanks a lot for checking out my site and I hope you have a good day.

  35. I hope your week has started out good. I have a new list for you all. This list has more links than the others. Happy link building!

  36. Good point! Interesting tips over here. I spent some hours trying to find such informations. I will also share it with a couple of friends interested in it. Right now with the work done, I’m going to watch some live Cams. Thank you very much!!

Leave a Reply